I made a list ,

I made this. Just in case if you wanted to make me happy. Or you're curious. Or to be a good friend. Or to help me expand my collections. That would be nice :) 

From this list, I only own Wuthering Heights. Still haven't got the chance to read though. 

Oh and did you know ?

When I purchased Wuthering Heights, I was asked by the worker in Kinokuniya whether I wanted the children's version or the literature one. True story. I wasn't sure how to feel. People still assumed me as a school girl. In other words, I look young haha. Even strangers, usually uncles and aunties asked why was I not in school when I was at the mall during weekdays. That happened all the time. I am used to it. But when I was asked whether I wanted a children's version book, that just took this height thing to a whole new level. Or worse, when I use my card to pay. The suspicious faces I got just made me grin like an idiot.

I don't get it. Honestly, I have the standard heights of most girls back home. BUT WHY DO PEOPLE LOOK AT ME DIFFERENTLY ? So unfair. Oh and don't get me started what happened during my euro trip last winter break hahahaha. 

Everytime this happened, I always tell my family. No comforting words, only laughs. Cheeeeers. 

P/s : I really do need a camera. I do not have mine right now. I need one. 

Mind wheel.

It is quite cold lately. One thing I love about winter is that everyone looks so cuddly. With the cold weather and every single person being cuddly, I do not have to have a reason to randomly hug people while they shiver haaa :D

I miss watching NFL and NHL with my dad. Or alone. 

I miss taking pictures but I need a new camera (haha).

I want to read but I need new books (need a break from brain, chest and heart for now but I know I am not supposed to and haha I am explaining). 

Plans have been made (I think). 

"Overthink. Unapproachable. Snob."

Oh you. Oh me. Oh my. 

"Please don't be in love with someone else. Please don't have somebody waiting on you."

Noelle ,

It's kind of a funny story. 

I think I can relate to the guy's character. I forgot his name. 

The thing is, I can relate. It is sick and selfish but that is how it is.

Do I need to talk to someone ?

Remember when I said I wanted to try to, "no need to explain, no need to complain" ? I am not sure if I am doing a good job with that. 

And Noelle is not the guy's name, that would be weird. Haaa.

(Twenty-something)th

I lost count. 

She is infuriating. She pisses me off. She always get on my nerves. She still makes me cry like I am a six year old girl though I just turned twenty-two. She always give comments that make me cries all the time and me end up sitting in the corner, sulking. She loves to hear me scream. She definitely loves to see me cry or bawling, even. She still give me the sloppy kisses that I hate. If I am lucky, she will just randomly bite or pinches my cheeks. Or give me her deadly hugs which I love, I think. 

She is a bully. 

She bullies. A lot. 

To this incredible human being, I would like to wish you a massive happy birthday. I am wishing you well with everything. Thank you for being annoying. Thank you for putting up with my annoyingness. You will always be the older sister that her younger sister looks up to. It kinds of hit me that I have difficulties to list the good things but not the negative ones haha. I kid. You are a wonderful person and if I were to make a list, it will be a long one. Well hope you had a great birthday without me and Benj. We love you too much. Thank you for making me happy. Thank you for being there for me, always. Thank you. :) <3

Love you and missing you so bad. Adik loves you so much. 

Again, 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY IZZATI ALIAH BINTI AB RAZAK ! :) <3

You questioned me when I did not post about your birthday last year. I just laughed. The edits on the photo are ridiculous and I am not sorry because I am annoying hahaha love you Kak Aliah ! :D

.................................................

"You're not a very good twin." Well, okay then.

"Why did you look like that?" Oh alright then.

This video made me so happy that I cried, you don't even know.

I would like to thank all the animals in this world that never fail to make me happy, cats especially.

Better than being angry,

So, one day, I was quite pissed with just everything.

This happened hahahahah.

So now,

It is just me and Frosty. I could not be happier. The bond that I have between me and her, only two of us, is absolutely incredible and just indescribable. Either I look at her and talk to her or she looks at me and meows. The most adorable thing ever. Ahhhhhh baby <3 (I sound like a proper catlady here. Haa.)

Frosty wasn't impressed of her overly attached mother (unrequited love).

I turned twenty-two last month. It was totally different compared to last year's that I actually laughed hahaha. My sister decided to do something different and made some cinnamon rolls instead of cakes. Friends treated me for lunch. It was good like if the room was burning, I wouldn't even notice. And I actually treated myself an actual cake for my birthday hahahaha. Like the first cake I ate was the cake that I bought myself. Well, that was me being a proper adult. So proud.

Not having any reasons to not be happy.

Quite depressing that you have to constantly pick yourself up.

< 24 hours

I will be writing more soon. I definitely will though I am still unsure of what to write.

So I heard, a blog is the prefect place for a coward to be a whiny bitch.

Despite that fact that I just said, I think I will be writing more soon. I may not have the actual idea of the things that I want to write but I just think I will. I feel giddy now haha. Oh well, have a good day everyone.

I may or may not have repeat the same things up here. Definitely unsurprising if you know me well enough :D

And my mission for my birthday this year is to collect birthday kisses from people that I meet on that day. So please be ready everyone ;)


Less than 24 hours !!!!! <3

To write or not to write,

To have a friend that will enable you to engage a proper conversation with pun intended everywhere is a WIN. You'll think yourself as a genius and basically, you'll be happy.

If you ever meet me.

Entertain me with a knock knock joke ( I don't mind if you want to do more) , please do. Had been playing this with my brother. We even made up few new one. Super lame but genius hahahahaha. 

Aaaaaaaaand ,

Found a girl who wrote a fan fiction. It's basically a story you made up and write about the person you idolize. Trust me, there are a lot of people doing this and I was amused for quite some time. It's a bit funny too.

Well she is lucky.

Since her story is so good. She has more than 30 thousand followers on twitter and few thousands on Instagram. People talk about her and her story, a lot. She's publishing her book soon even when it's still ongoing. It's not finished yet. So, she's writing for fun during her summer break and now, people can actually buy her book. Sooooo lucky !

I wish I have the confidence to let people read what I wrote. I have a hard time to let people to read my poem. What more if it's a story. Haaaaa

I wish to publish a book. 

Post examinations. Post Ramadhan. Post Eid.

Alhamdulillah.

Basically, this year's first day of Eid was definitely different. I actually wore an all white kebaya (the sisters too). I didn't have a say on this issue by the way haa. It was absolute torture. I had a hard time to prepare the food, to eat, to wash dishes, to take my short nap after eating (necessary haha). All and all it was torturous but to hear compliments here and there was quite nice haha. If I were to complain, that would be selfish and definitely asking for a slap (I dont like to be slapped). Therefore, I just want to say that I am grateful for everything. One word, Alhamdulillah :)

Besides things that happened yesterday, it felt different without my late grandfather. Without my grandmother's house (don't ask haa). Everything was so different. I'm not quite sure how to put all those in words but I am thankful that I got the chance to meet them. :)

And everyone's highlight on the first day, definitely was the outfit of the day (#ootd was everywhere haha). I wish to do the same. 

What I wore.

Hahahahahahahahahaha it became a tradition I think for me to annoy everyone before I asked for forgiveness every year. Therefore, dearest friends, dearest foes, do forgive me for all my wrongdoings. Might be intentional or not. I was still wrong. Hence, I am sorry. 

SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI MAAF ZAHIR DAN BATIN :) <3

Aaaaaaand it's the last eid for me and the metals baby :D

Pergi ,

Being the only grandchild that wasn't there when it happened was really sad. I was bawling the entire day. 

But it's not easy to face it again. 

You'll be missed dearest atuk :(

Truth to be told ,

Paranoid and scared. 

Both ?

BUT

Truth to be told,

I just want my mummy :'( 

<3

Being certain ,

The giddy goody happy giggly feelings that you get when you read a good book. Or you read something reaaaaaaally good after so long not being able to. I really do miss this kind of feelings when I get emotional and all worked up by just reading a book. I just can't wait. Haa.

Frosty has taken adorableness to a whole new level when she started to play with shadows.
It was really entertaining as she looked not quite smart by doing so.

Prefer black moving shadows instead of plump meaty fingers. ODD.


Oh on a side note, heard few people are getting married during the summer break  WOW.
To me, for someone to meet a stranger (assume you never know each other) and fell in love and being someone's other half is just really amusing.
I mean, like seriously, how can you know ?!!?
And when they get married, that's just. WOW. WOW. WOWWOW ?!? Haha

People have set their goals that they desperately want to achieve.
And to be married with someone, I, with no doubt will definitely say that is an ACHIEVEMENT.
Or you can replace the word achievement with any other word that fits your opinion.
But I stand tall with what I said (in my case, typed ? ) , it is an achievement.
When you decided to do it at a young age, you got a double achievement from me. Haha.

And yes, YES ! I heard you cause I am stopping. From frosty to marriage hahahahaha how in the world. I can't see the relation at all. Oh goooody. 

When you got such message by a lovely friend, you know, all you have to do is to love back.

So much love for her. Thank you sayang :) <3

Self explanatory ,

Oh. So. Yeah ?

"My mom called just now, and told me to go home next month for a match-make!"

Oh my hair smells like chocolate ,

Well apparently friends of mine had been sharing this video.
Though it is kinda late, I just feel like sharing and it doesn't kill for you to watch it again.

The best part of this video was when he said,
"You can't expect other people's spiritual journey to be same as yours."
Hands down, that was the line that I longed to hear for so long.
In all honesty, people at my place where I'm studying now are so full of themselves.
It is undeniable the fact that they were born and raised in a pious family is an advantage.
To have someone with capabilities to guide you ever since you were a kid, that is a pure blessing from Him.
You are lucky to have the chance to be raised and to live your life with a solid foundation.
Purely LUCKY and BLESSED.
Unfortunately, those qualities do not comprehend with how they carry themselves. SAD.
All they do is judge.
All they do is leaving ill comments.

Obviously no one can change instantly. Give other people a chance to change.
PATIENCE.
Might as well save your lousy comments to yourself if all you ever do is discourage the people who are actually trying to change. To be better. Booohooo !

People judged. People assumed. People jumped to conclusions.
The society that we are living in can be summed up as a sickminded-judgemental-selfish-hypocritepeople-andthiscouldgoonforever.

Sorry if I sound angry ? Haha but trust me, I am not.
Being opinionated can be taken the wrong way sometimes. Oh well.

I'm having finals now till next month. Do remember me in your prayers and pray for me, pretty people. Thank you :) <3

Live simply so other people can simply live ,

Being a cat might be the best thing one could wish for.
Whatever they do, they will just make anyone fall in love with them more and more.

The fact that I am turning twenty-two soon and here I am talking about cats is quite sad haha. Please put the image of a scary cat lady aside cause I can ensure you that I am far from that.
So far, I can say that having a kitten is quite fun.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand ,

Adik loves you so much Mummy ! :) <3

Good Company is the Most Beneficial ,

My room is not the place you have in mind when it is summer.
No one, I repeat, no one will ever want to sit in my room cause it is so hot.

It is so hot that my friends gave it names. A lot of nicknames. And everyone's favourite is SAUNA.
You can just sit doing nothing and you'll be sweating as if you just run non stop for like 10 minutes.
And I am not kidding.

So, I really do appreciate if any of my friends have the effort, the intention to come over.
You just have to know, the "Friend who visits my room during summer" is one of the people I love endlessly haha.

I was rejected by Frosty too because of my room.

Exaggeration ?
Come over then we'll continue from there haa.
So, to you, thank you :D

The good companion and the bad companion can be compared to a man who sells perfume and a blacksmith. When you visit the perfume seller he may give you a gift or you may purchase some musk from him and at the very least you leave with a sweet trace of his scent upon you. When you visit the blacksmith his flying sparks may burn your clothes and you will leave smelling of the smoke from his furnace.

—The Prophet Muḥammad

Blackout ,

I laughed at the title.
Not that it has double meaning or anything.
It just that since it's summer over here, blackout seems to be a daily thing (just so you know).

AND ,

Not even more than 5 minutes, NOPE.

I posted my previous post not for long before I deleted it haha. And surprisingly there were few people got the chance to read it haha.

So basically,

I am scared.
This is scary.
And I kid you not.

Allah almighty, He who knows everything.

Correct Me If I Go Astray ,

When Abu Bakr became the Khalifa he addressed people saying: “People!  If you see that I am on the right way help me.  But if you see that I am on the wrong way correct me.”

One of the people who was listening said: “If we see you on the wrong way we will correct you by the sword!”

Abu Bakr said, “I thank Allah that He has given me company which will correct me if I go astray!”

(Al-Kattani)

Goodness in Which There is No Evil ,

To love another person is to see the face of God. :)

Back to the first one cause it is always nice to be back to things that you're familiar with. 

I had been using the wechat app with my siblings and best friends. Had the time of my life as most of the conversations were ; singing, laughing, shrieking, screaming, teasing > real talks.

I can't help myself from laughing that I always struggle to breathe.

But now that I know how my voice sounds like, I kind of feel bad haha. I thought I sounded different but my sister was like "Awhhhh Kak Ibah, your voice. So mengada. I really miss your voice. I really miss you." 

Then it hit me, people had been listening to that voice for more than 21 years whenever I opened my mouth.

I feeeel sorry for everyone now hahahaah.

Yet I still get upset when people shut me up when I'm talking though they are kidding. Joking aside, I love to talk and I thought I have a really nice voice hahahahhahahahahha (I'm sorrrrrryyy :( )

The goodness in which there is no evil is: gratitude (to Allah) in times of well-being, and patience in times of misfortune.  Yet how many of those who are blessed are not thankful, and how many of those who are tried are not patient?

—Al-Ḥasan al-Baṣrī [d 110H/728CE]

Be a mountain ,

I was told once that sore is the new sexy and so I decided to give it a shot. In all honesty, I love every bit of it (not that I feel anything sexy about it) haha.

I had the usual conversations with my siblings yesterday. Like a tradition, they decided to make fun of me. Not that I'm not used to it. Only because the reason was quite annoying. It all started when Afiqah mentioned it is about time for me to find someone. As if on cue, my brother started to say other things. And one thing led to another, I was left dumbfounded not knowing what to reply. I was so annoyed, that's for sure. I could sense the seriousness but I tend to ignore them. All they did was laugh when I dodged every question they spat to me. One word, annnnnnnnnnoooyyyyinnnnngggggg !!!!!

Andddd, I crossed upon this while I was reading some stuffs. It is really goooood. Love it so much.

When you deal with people, in reality you are creating your own personality. You are the one drawing the image that they have of you in their minds. Based on this impression, they decide how to deal with you, and whether to respect you or not. Make sure that the tree is firmly grounded and is not uprooted by the winds, no matter how strong they may be. Just an hour of patience will result in victory. The more intelligent you become, the less ignorant you are. The more your worth increases, the less angry you become. Just like the seas that are not moved by anything. Be like a mountain and no wind will ever shake you!

—Dr. Muhammad ‘Abd Al-Rahman Al-’Arifi

Mother should I build the wall ?

If you involuntarily continue to sing the next line when you read the title, Hello !
We should be buddies, BEST buddies :D

Basically, I just need a cactus that needs not to be watered everyday. Not that I forget my responsibility to water or change the water for my pretty flowers. With cactus, less responsibility yet I can still feed my eyes with greens every morning (bliss) !

It just that, as weird as it sounds, the flowers tend to attract ants. Yes, really. ANTS !

The flowers are not giving out nice smell. Definitely far from anything sweet.
And so, without a doubt, ants are attracted to me. I guess ?
Being acknowledged for being sweet by the ants. Oh heck, I definitely deserve a moment haha.

In the past, the best of people, the noblest of people, and the people that were most trusted in matters of religion would go to rulers and command them (to do good deeds, to rule justly, and to apply Islamic law); meanwhile, others would stay in their homes and take no part (in the affairs of society on a political level); no one benefited from the latter group of people, and no one even noticed them. But as for now, it is the most evil of people who go to rulers and command them. And those who stay in their homes and don’t go to them are the best of people.

—Sufyān al-Thawrī [d. 161H/778CE]

Mouth might be shut. One shall not be judged by silence, isn't it ? :)

Reap Maximal Profit .

O youth! You are like a person traveling in the desert while possessing priceless jewels that he intends to sell in the land of reward, so beware of falling into the trap of your treacherous desire so you do not end up selling what you have for less than of what it is worth. Otherwise, when you reach your destination and see those who made great profits, you will cry for your loss and say, ‘Oh how great is my regret over what I neglected in regard to Allah. However, regret shall never restore what has been missed.

—Ibn al-Jawzī [d. 597H/1201CE]

High Motivation

Remember Greeny ?

Well, I got myself another Greeny since the first one did not end really well. And the second one did not end really well too (And I silently thought that I got green fingers haha sorry Ayah). Well I simply blamed my laziness. So, I decided to buy myself fresh flowers every week since I'm putting them pretty flowers on my study table. Talking about great company. It was great until I realized they didn't smell really good and its starting to bother me. I am definitely not throwing them away. Just going to wait until they ....... (did not end really well too haha).

Andddddddddddddd when I'm lazy, this quote helps. :)

Knowledge and action are twins whose mother is high motivation.

—Ibn al-Jawzī [d. 597H/1201CE]

Perfect

Hehehehehello (should be read with giggles then followed by hello) !

Sometimes, things happened.
I chose not to say anything. I chose to keep quiet about it.
I have opinions and I chose to keep them to myself.

:)

Lauren, everywhere. Everytime. Haha.

The typical tourist pose haha, I just had to.